What do you think of that new Quantum Sleeper, from Qsleeper, which doubles as a “safe room”?
Signed,
Creeped Out
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Dear Creeped,
I think that I don’t blame you for being creeped out! Qsleeper’s Quantum Sleeper is certainly an interesting concept, but it looks like a coffin which, I suspect, could become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Consider that the Quantum Sleeper is being offered as a way to protect yourself while sleeping from biochemical terrorist attacks, kidnappers, stalkers, bullets, and natural disasters.
In fact, according to QSleeper, the Quantum Sleeper “is a high-level security system designed for maximum protection in various hostile environments”, and which can be fitted “to provide protection from destructive forces of nature such as tornados, hurricanes, earthquakes and floods”.
Now, of all of those potential dangers, under which conditions are you most likely to actually be in the Quantum Sleeper? That’s right, natural disasters – tornados, earthquakes, and floods.
This is a “bed” which closes over you, to put it kindly, like a cigar box, and to put it more accurately, like a coffin. You pull the top down over you.
This means that if a natural disaster strikes, while you may survive the disaster itself, you will be unable to open the bed if several hundreds of pounds of debris have fallen on top of it. And unless they are passing out “Quantum Sleeper On Board” stickers for your bedroom window, nobody is likely to even think to dig you out from underneath before things like food and water, if you have any, and air run out.
Still, you’ll have something to entertain you as you pass the days slowly descending into your own private hell in your sensory-deprived altered state, if you had the foresight to order your Quantum Sleeper with the CD player, DVD Screen with PC hookup, Microwave and Refrigerator, Cellular Phones, CB and Short-wave Radio options.
Gee, kind of reminds me of the Pharoahs, come to think of it. So while it may not save you in this life, you’ll be well outfitted for the afterlife.